Expectations
by momonono
Summary: This the sequel to trust. No, you do not need to read trust to get this story, but you can. AC pairing.
1. Meeting with Casey

**AN: I do not own characters, Dick Wolf does. Sequel to Trust. Happy Sunday!**

I guess most people would like to hear my side of the story. Here it goes.

My name is Alexandra Cabot, but you can call me Alex. Well, I am heading to my psychologist's office, to talk. I don't have a problem, but I decided to start going once I was admitted into SVU. Those victims and the crimes. I couldn't deal with it alone.

I entered the building and walked towards the all too familiar room.

I sat on the couch. "Good afternoon, Alex." Dr. Grey stated. He is sitting directly in front of me. "How are you feeling?"

"Ok, I guess." I cross my legs.

He nods, "Well, we left off on Olivia and your relationship with her."

"Yea, she was everything to me. I loved her and she betrayed me…I never knew why we broke up, but we did. I couldn't let go of her. She hurt me…badly. I saw her a couple months later and she was with Abbie. I don't know what came over me. I wanted her to feel the pain that she inflicted on me. So I slept with Abbie…It was hard to do. I had to get Abbie to love me first…I know it was a horrible thing to do. I got over her soon after. I ruined a relationship …" I shift in the chair

"Ok, you told me, while in witness protection you met someone?"

"In witness protection…I did meet someone…It wasn't real. Emily wasn't me...I was so happy when I could be called Alex once again...but I was talking about a trial I had to go to…The guy that shot me was on trial…I met the ADA, Casey Novak. She caught my eye once I glanced at her. Something in me snapped. I wanted to prove to her that I am still this great ADA...I wanted to impress her, but instead I ended up making her feel uncomfortable and less than...that wasn't my intention. See, I had to be professional that day because if I wasn't…I think I wouldn't have gone through all this trouble getting her." I told him.

"What do you mean trouble?" He asked.

This is where my story begins.

I came back to SVU a year ago. I was in the WPP (Witness Protection Program) because of a case we were working on.

I know this is where I want to be. I want to show off my new found knowledge and share it with the world…not really…but I love fighting for the good guys. I was actually the only ADA assigned to SVU, but that soon changed as I was assigned to baby sit Casey Novak. At that time, I wasn't up to it. I didn't need to drool on a girl who is probably straight.

I kind of had a crush on her. I would see her everyday and she had this charm to her. It was irreisistable. I became infatuated with her...I fell in love with her...every day she would come into the office and ask me to check paper work for her, I would make it longer and have some small talk with her...and...She is just adorable. Well, all that daydreaming crashed...

I was in my office and I decided that today would be the day that I ask Casey Novak to a dinner. I really cared for her in my own little way and I knew that I just had to at least let it be known that we can start something together. As I was walking towards her office, I hear Olivia and Casey laughing and giggling. I didn't think nothing of it. Two friends catching up or laughing off a case.

I come closer to the door and I heard it...clear as a bell...words that ripped my heart out. "Olivia, I love you." One thing that was in my mind was...I was right she is gay and Damn it. It crushed me...to see her with Olivia. Olivia will hurt her, like she hurt me and that isn't...I wish I was straight forward early on.

That is not where my story truly starts. It starts here at my office.

My phone rings and I quickly pick it up. I have mountain top of paper work and I need to finish it before McCoy asks for it. He is always complaining that I don't turn in my paper work on time. I don't have time because I have doubled the paper work.

"ADA Alexandra Cabot, How may I help you?" I ask as giddy as I can.

"Hey, Alex, I am just wondering if you can come over. I really need to talk to someone…and well, I…" I can't believe Casey called me...This is a once in a life time opportunity.

I place my pen down, "I'm actually off right now. I can pass by right now. One question." I don't have her address.

"What's the question? And if it's something like…"

"I meant where is your house, I never been there." I tell her before she jumps to conclusions.

I write it down and finish the work I was doing and head to her house. I really don't know why I agreed to this...I know, its because I have a huge crush on a taken ADA.

Yesterday I was going into her office hoping that I could talk to her and she is there with Olivia...I decide to play with them a little bit. She has this cute face when I pretend to hit on Olivia.

I knock on her door and all I want to do is hug her. I stretch out my arms and she hugs me. She smells so good and she looks so cute.

She led me to her couch and went to go get water. I think I had this look on my face. She quickly sits next to me.

"I am sorry. I want to talk about my love life." Damn it...I am not supposed to know that she and Olivia are together...Play it cool...

"I am a lesbian. I don't think I can be much help to you."

What? I could be help to you...what is wrong with me...

I notice she is staring at my boobs. She turns flush red. I didn't mean to make her embarrassed.

"Sorry,"

"It's ok I am all ears." I tell her smiling.

"I'm not going to place names so bare with me. Ok. I am going out with this guy for about 5 years and he was taking me home yesterday."

What? She has been with Olivia for 5 years? Now I know my chances are blown. I nod for her to go on.

She is choosing her words carefully. "He asks me 'am I jealous' I ask of what? And he replies 'of a woman at his job' I don't have an answer to that and he suddenly changes his posture. The big dinner we had planned was just him going to sleep." She looks awfully hurt by this. That is a typical Olivia move.

"Why didn't you answer him? Why do you think he got mad or distant all of a sudden?" I ask curiously.

"I found a wedding ring in his…Pocket of his pants..." She hesitated. That means Olivia was going to tie the knot.

"Awww. He was going to propose?" I reply back surprised.

I reach out my hand and touch her knee. She is so warm and her body tenses up. I smile at her. Maybe I should give up this charade.

"So let me get this straight. Is this '_guy_' named Olivia Benson…" She looks like she is hyperventilating. I move my hand to her back. "Whoa…Are you ok? You don't look so good" I chuckle to myself.

"How did you know?" she gasps.

I chuckle to myself, "it doesn't take a genius to put that together. I knew you were a lesbian, and well I never seen, not one guy, come into your office. If a relationship carried on for 5 years, I would think he cared about you that much to come at least once. Not to mention Olivia come to your office way more than she needed to. Oh," I start to snicker, "and Olivia is dressed for a date and comes to _you_ for a testimony." I shake my head and remove my hand from her back.

She starts to giggle a little too which is so hot. "I am sorry to ask this, but if you _knew_ Olivia was my girl, why are you always hitting on her?"

Great question. A laughing fit came upon me and as I was trying to catch my breath...the truth came out, "I loved your reaction to it. It was cute. I mean really cute. You would scrunch your face and Olivia would just be telling you to calm down. Yesterday had to be the cutest face you made." Did I just say that?

She leans on the chair and shuts her eyes, "So, I'm cute when I'm mad?" She asks.

I get closer, "Yes. Want to know something even better, Novak?"

"What?" She asks with her eyes still shut.

I get close to her ears and whisper, "I have a crush on you." I really don't know why I am being this open.

She opens her bright green eyes and turns towards me, "Really? Why didn't you tell me?"

I was stupid and I didn't think anything of it. Moreover, Olivia is in the way. "I think you know." I answer.

Suddenly this feeling comes over me and I straddle myself on her lap.


	2. Fall in love

**AN: Hey nice output on this story. I updated it because I already had it written and because ****UB and RH ****is not getting updated today...lost track of time so here this is. :)**

"I have…" She seems flustered and I knew that it was a bad idea. I didn't mean for her to feel uncomfortable.

I really screwed up. "I'm so sorry. I don't know what the hell has gotten over me," What the hell was I thinking. I feel my face grow hot.

"It's ok. I know what…I know how that feels."

She doesn't know how it feels. To want someone who is taken. This is embarrassing. I am fool in love with a taken woman. She is going to get engaged for God's sake.

After a couple minutes of silence, "If it is worth anything, I felt the same thing, too." She replied.

I look at her and smile.

"However, I don't think we should do this to Olivia."

She obviously likes me enough to tell me that...

"Agree." I drag out of my mouth.

"Want anything? I am a little starving." She gets up from the couch.

I nod.

I watch her walk into the kitchen. There must be something in her that wants me...I head to the kitchen and lean on the counter. She doesn't see me until she shuts the refrigerator.

She gives me this questioning look, "Hey, are you spying on me?"

I look at what she is making. "Not spying, It is more like, I don't think…you don't know what type of sandwich I want." I reply simply.

I walk over to her and try to help her.

"I… Ok, you can do whatever you want."

I grab a plate and place bread on my plate. I slowly placed ham and lettuce. At one point we both grabbed the pickles and I let it go knowing she wouldn't and guess what...it fell.

"Alex!" She screamed as I jumped back. Thankfully the jar did not smash into millions of pieces.

After a while I start to laugh and she joins in. "This is_ so_ your fault." She giggles.

I decided to help her clean the pickles and I grabbed two paper towels and handed one to her.

She got up to throw away what she picked up when she slipped over the juice and fell down.

I really tried to keep my laughter inside, but it just flew out of me.

Her expression is hilarious. I decide to help her up so I hold out my hand, only for her to pull me down with her and I end up on top of her...only we are not laughing anymore.

It felt right...us against the world. I stared into her sharp green eyes always full of passion. I leaned and captured her lips in mine. It wasn't one sided because she kissed me back with added fervor. I slowly deepened the kiss and her lips parted to give me full entry. I moved towards her neck and I knew sensations were running across her body as she moaned. She places her hand on my bare back as my shirt starts lifting. I pull her shirt off surprised that she aided me to it.

A smile strides across my face as my dreams come to life. I slowly rub her breast as I kiss her once more. Eliciting a moan once again.

Her phone rings and I stare deep into her eyes. She looks like she is scolding the phone.

"I have to get it." She stares.

I stop her, "Leave it." I reply.

"I have to…I mean…I have to." She smiles softly.

I nod and get off of her. She heads to get her phone.

I start to clean up the rest of the pickles. Once I am done with that she is still one the phone.

I realize that I almost had sex with Casey Novak, and I realize she is taken. What I realized is that Casey Novak is having problems in her relationship with Olivia. She is not happy and I can do that for her. This is not like Abbie ,I didn't love her...but, I do love Casey and if I can get her to know that...maybe I can have her.

She comes back in and opens her mouth and shuts it.

"I think Olivia must hate what you did yesterday so much that she canceled on you." I try to joke...It obviously didn't go well if she has this sad face on...I try to redeem myself, "What was that call about?" I ask her.

She stares at her phone. "Olivia. She sent Elliot to tell me that she will not be coming home today. Another thing she doesn't do. She told Elliot about us." She seems distraught.

I try with another joke, "Who was the girl that _you were_ jealous of…" I state as I lean on the wall. She looks at me and continues...Why is she jealous of me?

"I don't get it…I mean I do get it. She hate's when I'm jealous and she _especially _hate's when I don't trust her or give her the feeling that I don't. I understand why she is mad, but…this…the way she is acting is totally different. If we have a problem, she would be the first to fix it…even if I don't want to."

I pull her in close with my hands at both her sides.

"Alex..."

I shut her up with a kiss to her lips. She stops to breathe and I lean my forehead on hers.

She continues, "Alex, this..." She signals with her hand, "This can't become nothing. I don't want..."

"Casey, just let go. Olivia will never get hurt because she will never know, right?" I ask her. I lean and kiss her on her neck.

"Right." She simply replies.

"Look, it's getting late. I have to go, but, call me." I have an appointment with Dr. Grey.

I give her a kiss on the lips and she walks me out the door.

"Thanks, for cleaning the pickles." She giggles.

I smile and walk towards the elevator. There is obviously a smirk on my face, I feel joyful and blissful.

I enter into Dr. Grey's office and sit on the couch.

"Nice to see you again, Alex. You look very happy compared to yesterday's session." He observed.

"Yes, something great happened today...I finally got Casey." I answer him smiling because I can't contain it.

"I see. Did she break up with Olivia?" he asked me.

The smile suddenly wipes off my face, "No...that is what I came here for." I answer back.

"What are you getting from this, Alex? You are helping a woman cheat. Did you not promise yourself not to do this again? Especially to Olivia? How did you feel about it?" He asks me.

"I am getting a will to fight for someone I love..." I breathe, "I know what I promised myself, but Casey is different. I actually have feelings for her. I can take care of her... better than Olivia can and I am not afraid of loving her. I will make the whole world know that she is mines...You know Olivia ruined her evening yesterday? It is a typical Olivia move to drop everything and leave the one you love hanging." I argue.

"You obviously love her. Do you think you are being selfish in your wants?" he asks me.

I lean back on the chair.

"What happens if she gets close to you and chooses Olivia instead?" He asks a simple question.

To me it wasn't. Tears trailed down my face and I let them drip down. "I will be hurt...I know I never loved someone as much as I do her. I have a chance and I want to take it...no matter how immoral it is. I love her...I am afraid to tell her that...But, she feels the same somehow...and that is what will keep us going." I answer with tears continuing to engulf my eyes.

"You obviously attached yourself to her. Did you think of the pain it will cause her to leave Olivia?" he asked me.

I shake my head, "She has been with Olivia five years...but she acted upon her feelings with me. She kissed me back, she _kissed me _back and that is what counts." I answer him wiping my tears from my face.

"I asked you a question, _Did_ _you think of the pain it will cause her to leave Olivia?"_ He asked once again.

"No, because I plan for her to be happy with me not some ass that will take her for granted." I reply.

"Ok...Are you trying to get back at Olivia, somewhere deep down?" he asks me.

I give him a skeptical face, has he not been hearing what I have said this past few minutes? "No. This is about Casey...and if Olivia hadn't gotten to her I would have." I answer sternly.

He could tell I am heating up, "Tell me about your day with Casey." He asks.

I start to smile, "She is glorious. I loved talking to her and she is beautiful...everything I ever wanted in a girl...She makes me smile. I wish that she was all mines...just so I can just talk to her about anything and everything, tell her how much I love her, treat her with respect...treat her the way she should be treated." I kind of chuckle. One thing I love about her is that she is inadvertently hesitant...I love that innocence about her. Very cute."

Dr. Grey smiles at me. "She must make you really happy...you just about went through all your emotions in this one session so I will end it with you being happy." He shut his book.

I drove home actually the same way I came out of Casey's house, blissful and joyful.

**AN: What do you think?**

**-I will Certainly update The Uptight Blonde and The Red head tomorrow. **


	3. Engagements and Heartbreaks

**AN: Hey This is an update and I hope you like it. :)**

As I was driving to my office Fin called me to come to the precinct for a case. So I quickly turned the car and headed for the precinct.

I entered the precinct and saw that no one was there...then I heard Elliot softly saying "finally". I walk up to him and he quickly puts his finger over his mouth shushing me.

"Olivia just asked Casey to marry her..." He whispered and pointed.

No way in hell Casey is going to say yes...after what happened today...

I hear Olivia muffled, "Is that a yes?"

Elliot starts jumping. "She said yes!" he whispered quietly.

I turn around and walked away slowly. How can I be so stupid? She was going out with Olivia for 5 years. I just...I was blinded by love and by her beauty and her everything that I didn't notice that I still had to deal with Olivia and I should have seen this coming putting my hopes up only to get them crushed.

"Alex..." Elliot called.

"I...Have to get something in my office," I state as my voice cracks.

I head to my car and I drive home.

I get dressed for bed and promised myself I won't cry about this. I broke that promise. Once I laid in my bed, my mind wandered.

I want her so bad. I know she wants me. I didn't hear her say yes...maybe Elliot is wrong. Maybe he's not. Tears slowly came down my face and landed on my pillow. I feel so pathetic. I will have to go into Dr. Grey's office and tell him it didn't work out...

No! I am going to fight for her. I will show her that I am the right one for her. I love her and you don't let someone you love go easily you fight. That is what I am going to do...I am going to fight for her until I win. I have to.

**Next Day**

I head into my office and I am not ready to see Casey yet. Once I do get the nerve and calm down a little I knock on her door. I hear faint shuffling.

"Come in." she simply states I enter and she has a huge smile on her face.

I lock the door. "Hey, Case. What's up?" I ask her. She points to the seat and I sit down.

"I am engaged…" She breaths out.

"I know, congrats." I looked at the floor..."So, what does this mean about us?"

"I don't know, Alex. I felt so guilty, so, so guilty. I betrayed her, even if we cut this off, I don't think I will be able to stop thinking about you." She shakes her head.

I get up and start to massage her to get her to relax; quite frankly I am not going give easily.

"Calm down. Relax. I couldn't get you out of my mind either." I whisper softly to her.

She turns her chair around and grabs me and I sit on her. I lean in for a kiss.

Have you ever had that _Holy Shit _moment when you get caught doing something that wasn't quite exactly right...well that is what exactly happened right now...

"Casey? Why is your door locked?" Olivia asked.

"Hey…babe…uhm…I am a little busy and I didn't want to be bothered so I locked it…hold on…" Casey replies.

She looks at me and points under the desk. I roll my eyes and comply. She leans to kiss me. "Thank you" she whispered.

I must be crazy to do this...Alexandra Cabot hiding under a desk...That is a crazy thought.

She headed to open the door for Olivia. "Hi, babe." I hear some shuffling.

"What took you so long?" Olivia asked.

"I tripped." Casey simply replies...I chuckle and so does Olivia.

"I am so sorry…are you ok?" Olivia asks.

"Yea..." Casey replies as she takes a seat.

"I actually came to look for Alex. Elliot needed her for a warrant…have you seen her?" There was a pause.

"Thank you." Casey replies.

Olivia leans over the desk and I hear kissing sounds...ugh...

"See you at home." Olivia walks out of the office and shuts the door.

"It was so hard not to laugh." I climb out of the desk and dust myself off.

She pushes me..."You should call Elliot."

"I'm going, I'm going." I lean in to give her a quick peck on the lips.

I smile back at her and exit the office.

I entered my office and called Elliot. "Hey, Elliot. I sent the warrant with one of my assistants."

"Ok. I actually wanted to talk to about what happened yesterday."

"Yea...I have to go...I have a lot of paperwork to do..."I said as I shut the phone.

I really don't want to talk to Elliot about me leaving the precinct once I heard that Casey was engaged.

After three hours of nonstop working I decided to go check on Casey. I want to run an idea past her and hopefully she will say yes. So, I softly knocked on her door. "It's Alex," I whisper as I come in and lock the door. "Hey, I thought of the bestest idea ever!" I smiled.

"Bestest?" she shakes her head.

"Yes. Tell Olivia you will be stuck at work for a couple of hours and me and you could hang out." I smirked.

"No. Olivia needs me now." She replies softly.

"She had you for 5 years and I can't have this one day?" I pout.

I know I got her, "I…stop doing that." She throws a pen at me.

"Now, was that nice?" I state lustily to her in her ear.

She turns to kiss me.

"Now, that was nice." She smiles.

"It was," I answered back.

She quickly got up and delicately pushed me towards the wall and she got so close I felt her breathing on my lips.

"I'm going to pleasure you with more niceness." She stated with passion in her eyes.

"Show me." I replied softly.

She started to kiss me and I deepened it pulling her closer and closer. Parting my lips to let her enter. It escalated to touching and kissing...

"Oh…Casey" I moaned in the kiss. She smiled as if she succeeded in something and she started unbuttoning my shirt. As she was about to remove my shirt, her phone rings.

Another ruined moment because of a phone.

**AN: What do you think..? So much more Alex and Casey time :)**


	4. Casey's Apartment

**AN: Here is Expectations.**

"Leave it," I breathlessly tell her.

She turns back towards me, "But…It might be…Olivia." She smiles warmly at me and heads to the phone.

"Novak..." She speaks into the phone. "No…no…I ugh…held my breath…to see how long I can go without air."

I think that I should be disappointed, because of my selfishness I am helping a woman cheat on her fiancé.

She looks back at me. The inevitable happened. I nodded and put my shirt back on.

"Yea, ok, see you." She replies before she shut the phone. She sits on the desk and grabs me by the waist. "Thank you."

I lean to kiss her lightly. "She is your priority. I am actually starting to feel stupid for doing this. You are engaged for Christ sakes. I just can't keep my hands off of you." I held the tears from falling out of my eyes.

She stares into my eyes and I avert it. "Alex, I…you are not stupid. I wouldn't blame you for what we have, because it takes two to tango."

I give her a slight smile, "I just…I don't want to get you hurt." I really care about her and If this hurts her in the long run I want no part of her getting hurt because it will hurt me just as much.

"I put myself in this situation. Ok. Don't worry. Now, go. Olivia will be here any minute." I turn to walk and she slaps my ass.

"Fix yourself; you don't want Olivia to think you are cheating." I warned her as I walked out of the office.

I head to my office and instead of leaving like I was going to...I decide to close my office door and sit with only a lamp open.

I looked over my cases for a while until I couldn't take it anymore. Tears just flowed out of me.

What type of person would do this to themselves? How do I even know that Casey will choose me? I will never get to be with her... or have her to myself. She is Olivia's and I shouldn't interfere with relationships. I did it last time and look where it left me...lonely and with no one. If Casey finds about my real past with Olivia she would probably think twice about everything I have done for her...She would second guess everything...What if I am just a fling to her...

All these questions lingered in my head as tears continued to flow out of my eyes...

I hear a knock on my door...I grab the file I was looking at and wipe my tears.

"Come in," I try to tell the person as my voice cracks.

"Hey, Alex." I hear a familiar voice...Olivia and Casey come into my office. As if my day can't get any worse.

"Hey, what brings you two here?" I ask the both of them acting as if I was never crying.

"I just needed to make sure you signed on the statement from the case today." Olivia gave me the paper.

"Yea, sure." I signed the papers and handed them back to her.

"Thank you. Look Casey and I are going to her apartment and hang out and you can join us maybe to a girl's movie night?" Olivia asked me.

Not only is that a bad idea...Casey is staring me down.

"No, I think I shouldn't intrude on your… party." I reply gently.

"Come on! It would be fun. Is it because of Casey? You know she is always a grump at work. Let it be like the old times at the bar. Come on, Alex!" Olivia continued to press.

"Ah, Ok." I agreed after a couple seconds.

"Ok, great. We are going to Casey's house. I don't think you have ever been there so…"

"I know where it is." I quickly reply without thinking.

I quickly stare at Casey, who looks shocked.

Olivia turns towards Casey but addresses me, "You know where Casey lives? That's weird..."

Casey shrugs.

**Casey's Apartment**

Once I arrived to the apartment. Casey was hostile to me. I looked at her with apologetic eyes. She wouldn't budge.

I was eccentric when Olivia decided to force us to prepare the snacks together as I entered the kitchen with her.

She grabbed the bowls and I grabbed the ice cream.

"I know you are mad, but it's Liv. If I said no, she would have tried harder." I looked around the corner of the kitchen and saw Olivia still looking at movies.

I press my lips against hers, making small circles in her waist, just letting her know how sorry I am.

"Alex, do you really want to get caught kissing me?" she asks whispering.

"You can say I came on to you," I tell her...She looks at me sadly... "Sorry, I thought it could be kind of like a risk." I smile.

"That kiss was good, but later, please." She begs. She looks out the corner and gives me a peck on the lips. "Now, let's get these ice creams in a bowl before she notices we haven't been back."

I nod.

After a few minutes she speaks up again, "Alex, can I ask you a question?"

I nod, "Anything." I reply as I am moving the bowls for her.

"Why were you crying?" She asks innocently.

I turn to her and breath, but before I can let anything out, Olivia comes in and Casey and I are way too close to each other.

"Hey, I don't know if you are sizing each other, but let's keep the fighting to a minimum."

I turn towards Olivia shyly. She grabs her bowl and heads out with Casey who sends me a smile before walking out.

I bring my bowl to the living room and ask Casey if I could go to the bathroom. She looked so uncomfortable with Olivia. Or at least what I saw.

When I came back they just sat there...in silence, "Are we going to watch this movie?"

I have to say... exactly thirty minutes into the movie, Casey was asleep.

I noticed I was dozing off too. So I got up to leave.

"Hey, where are you going?" Olivia asked me.

"Home." I reply.

"I can't let you sleep on the wheel... how about you sleep over?" She asked me.

"No,,, I don't want to intrude on Casey..."

"She is sleeping...and you are not intruding." She quickly replies. "You can sleep in the room all the way to you right." She replied to me.

I nodded my head tiredly and walked into Casey's room and plopped my head on her pillows, which smelled like her. I will fight for her. I don't care how much influence Olivia may have on her...But I am going to win her heart.

**AN: I was distracted and didn't have time to make this longer. :)**


	5. Heart Felt

**AN: Posting another chapter tomorrow. :)**

A couple minutes of lying, I hear Olivia leave the apartment. A bunch of muffled dialogue later, I hear the door getting locked.

I shut my eyes as Casey walks into the room. She went straight for the bathroom.

Once she gets out she slowly gets on the bed.

I open my eyes, "I was waiting for you to get in bed."

She seems startled and smiles. "Why?" She asks laying down.

"I never seen you sleep, and you said we can finish that kiss later. Later is kind of now." I tell her smiling.

"I know, but can we hold off on that until a little bit. I want to know why you were crying?" She replies in a demanding tone.

I really don't want to talk about this... "I don't want to talk about it. It was stupid." I get closer and lay on her chest. She is so soft and warm. She breathes so evenly.

"It's not stupid. Tell me." She demands once again.

Well, I have to give in. Its Casey...the one who makes my heart melt. In resignation I reply, "Ok, I was…I think we should cut this off. I see how Olivia looks at you and I can't give you those five years back…I don't know why you are always on my mind. I find that I can't think straight and my mind wonders… a lot." I chuckle.

I lift her shirt and make small circles, making myself occupied with that.

"I want you, but can't have you." I tell her.

"I want you, but can't have _you, _too. It's just that Olivia is my fiancée and I don't think she knows what she did when she left you on my bed."

She is right Olivia doesn't know what she did when she left me on her bed. I lean to deliver soft kiss on her neck.

"Umm Alex" She moans.

I know I am doing something right. I slowly lead up to her ears to which she moans softly, I smile against her skin, and I lead back to her lips. She immediately parted her lips and let me dominate.

While kissing her, I lead my circles into her pants. I smile. She must me really turned on. "Oh My Gosh, Casey, you are really wet." I tell her through the kiss.

I notice she was yearning for this feeling. I wonder...how long it has been since Olivia touched her.

I start rubbing faster and her back arches off the bed. "Ugh!" She screams. I take this as a hint and start rubbing faster. I can feel her body clench and she reaches her climax. "Alex!" she yells out. As she collapses on the bed.

I lean to bring her back to reality and start kissing her on her neck. Slow, deliberate, kisses.

I look at her vibrant green eyes. "You liked that?" I ask her.

"How did you learn that?" She asks me.

I smile at her. "You." I simply state.

I continue to kiss her all over.

"Alex," she mutters, "We are heading to work tomorrow…" She continues.

I climb on top of her and pin down her arms. I place all my hair to the right side and tilt my head a bit and lean toward her ear.

"Casey…" I speak lustily towards her ears. I am taken aback by the beautiful sight ahead of me. "You are so beautiful…I just want you to be mines… so bad. I feel so restricted. I don't want to put you in a crazy position."

"Alex, we only have been in this for a few days…" She sits up, "What we have is so complicated. I never, had a connection like this, not with Olivia…" She smiles, "That…what you just did for me was amazing. I don't know…but there is something about you that attracts me so. I don't…want to feel this…it's so wrong…but so right…" Tears start falling out of her eyes.

I hate seeing her gloomy.

"I love Olivia. I really do, but I don't know what to do. I feel this…between us…I don't want to hurt Olivia but I don't want to leave you. I know at some point I will have to choose…"

I hate that word _choose. _I knew it would come up and It sucks, I hate that I am the one putting her in this situation. Tears made its way down my cheeks. "…Casey…you _don't _have to choose…" I tell her.

"I will Alex. You know it as much as I do…someone is going to get hurt…and if it happens, I want it to be me…"

She is so loving. She wants to be the one hurt...even though I was the one who caused this relationship to blossom and she wants to get hurt rather than hurt someone. I love her.

I lean to kiss her, "So what do we do now?" I ask her.

"I am falling in love with you…I already tripped and fell twice…I just don't know when I fall again, who's hand will I grab, Olivia's or yours." She tells me.

I think it is great that she is falling in love with me, but she is still having feelings for Olivia...I mean why wouldn't she? She has been with Olivia for five years and with me for only a day...I am not stupid for falling in love with her... but, It is what it seems. I can't lie to myself and tell myself that there is a huge chance she would choose me...all I can do Is sway her towards my side. Slowly, I am doing that. She is falling in love with me and that is what counts in my book.

Somewhere deep inside I wish I was direct with her from the moment I had seen her. Maybe this would have been easier if it wasn't Olivia. Not only that, Olivia and I ended in good terms after I apologized. She is practically pushing me towards Casey and that is ok with me.

I stare at her, "It's twelve sixteen in the morning. Let's sleep." I climb off of her and end up on my side of the bed.

She shuts the light and I lay facing the roof. I just stared into the darkness until slumber overpowered me.

**AN: Yay! Remember I posting another chapter tomorrow. :)**


	6. Resentment Is An Overstatement

**AN: So I am going to try to write this before I head to the game hope you like.**

**Next Day**

I feel a gentle touch on my arm. "Alex..." I hear Casey whisper softly.

I open my eyes to her beautiful complexion. "Hey," I reply to her.

She smiles and kisses me on my forehead. "Olivia, is picking us up at eight, it's exactly seven so take your shower and dress up."

I smile as I head to the shower and clean up.

After I finish and head to the kitchen. I see Casey pacing...she looks a little angry and I decide to stay quiet and wait.

I soon hear a knock on the door and see Olivia trying to explain herself on...I don't know what...which in turn gets Casey pissed. She lets me walk out the door first and even when we got into the car she was pissed off. She slammed the door. I pretended that I did not know what was going on. I decided it was best to ignore.

Once Olivia got to our job, Casey quickly exited the car.

"Sorry, Alex...I really don't know what has gotten into her." Olivia gives me a warm smile.

I nod and exit the car, following Casey hopelessly. I was about to enter her office, when she suddenly shuts the door.

I know she is angry about something and if I make her feel better she would at least forget about whatever is bothering her.

I softly knock on her door. "Ugh…Come in." She answers with an attitude.

I enter and I see her demeanor and it is not pretty. I lock the door.

I know what I want to ask, but...I choose my words wisely. "Casey, did something happen between you and Olivia?" I approach her slowly.

"Alex…Look we both have to work today…I just want to focus, ok?" She starts working on something.

I can't believe this bullshit. I take a seat and continue to pry, "Casey, what is bothering you?" I soothingly ask her.

She looks angrier than before, "Alex, please…later." She demands. I decide to continue.

I usually get what I want. All I want is what's best for her. If she talks out whatever is bothering her...she may feel better.

"Look, I am pretty sure we are going to get somewhere with this whether you like it or not. I don't care how mad you are." I reply to her harshly.

"Alex! I can't play these games right now. I am fucking pissed right now ok! Just go…please." She angrily responds.

I look at her for a few moments...somehow I am staying calm... "Look, I am actually trying to hear you out. Don't shut me out. What the hell is bothering you this much."

She ignores me.

After a couple minutes of silence her expression alters, "I'm going to call Olivia. Look, I promise I will tell you later."

And there goes my chance out the door. All I can reply is, "Uh…yea…ok."

I get out of the room and head straight for my office. Somehow I ended up angry. Angry at everything really...These cases, falling in love with Casey, angry that a bullet couldn't kill me...

After half an hour, I hear a knock on my door. "Come in." I call out.

I noticed I made a mistake as I see Casey walking into my office. I send her darts with my eyes, "Oh, I thought you wanted to do work?" I remind her of her actions earlier.

She quickly locks the door and sits down. "I was an ass earlier." No shit, Sherlock.

I start back at my work, and ignore her.

"Alex…I…Alex!" She screams.

I continue to ignore her and looking over a case I have been looking over since I have gotten here.

"I am sorry…ok. I am sorry. I was pissed and I shouldn't have shut you out like that. I am just an idiot who doesn't think." She tells me.

I continue to ignore her, baring more attention on the case file.

She continues, "I don't know…what do you want me to do Alex?"

I can tell she is getting desperate...but I am too angry to even accept. She will have to try harder than that.

"Since you are ignoring me I just want to say that you are being unreasonable. I don't understand why saying 'sorry' can't cut it with you. I actually meant it…what do you want from me?" She continues on her desperation act.

"I am working…_Maybe_ you should work to." I reply to her without looking away from the paper.

"Yea, I guess. Well, I will be out with Olivia for lunch if you are going to be looking for me." She replies.

That, did not only hurt...but made me realize that...Casey and I, as much as I love her, are not destined to be together.

She gets up and walks out of the office. I shake my head.

I hear a knock that is familiar...usually Elliot's knock... "Come in," I voice.

He waltzes in smiling and shutting the door behind him.

"Hey...I just ran into Casey..." Elliot sat on the seat.

"What do you want Elliot?" I ask him in annoyance.

She stares at me, "You _did _call me here to go over the case...you seem to be reading...so did you find enough evidence?" Elliot asked.

"Sorry, I was busy today...I can finish reviewing after six and talk to you tomorrow...I have a lot in my mind..."

"You mean Casey..."

"Excuse me?" I answer back.

"She looked pissed coming out of here...Did she screw up?" Elliot asked.

"Right you are." I answer truthfully.

He nodded his head slowly. "Look, Casey isn't that bad...I mean she does know what's right...and fights for it...give her a chance. That Case she threw away...she believed she could do right." Elliot replies.

I nod.

"Well, I am off." He replies as he opens the door to find Casey standing there...A quick dialogue between them sends her fleeing away.

He turns and shuts the door. I notice it is time for my appointment and I head to my doctors office.

**AN: I wrote this before I left foe the game ( the reason why it is soo short.) I am still coming up with a schedule.**


	7. I Love You?

I enter the all too familiar room and sit down on the couch. I don't feel like talking. Today has been especially rough. Casey,...and... I just don't feel like talking about it.

"Good Afternoon, Alex. How have you been?" he asks me cheerfully.

"Great." I reply sarcastically.

"Well, do you want to talk about it?" he asks me slowly.

"No." I reply once more.

"Alex...Look, we left off on...let's see...Casey and how much you adore her...How have you and Casey gotten along recently?" He asks trying to push me to talk.

"Great." I reply sarcastically once again.

"Ok, if you don't want to talk Alex...we are going to stay in here until your appointment is up..." He replies.

I shrug. I really don't care to stay in silence for another hour.

"Casey probably hates you..." He states out of the blue.

Of course I talk because I was born to defend...especially myself. "It is actually the other way around. She got engaged to Olivia and she wouldn't even talk to me! I try so hard! So damn fucking hard to get through to her and it's not working. Nothing is working. She is so stubborn and when she gets angry she just shuts down!" I ramble on and on getting heated as I continue.

"Alex...doesn't that remind you of someone...You are stubborn and you shut me out until I made that comment. You have to understand that there are people just like you out there...For example, that victim you spoke to me about. She reminded you of when you were young and you were so annoyed by her actions that you didn't even want to try the case. It turns out that she _was _going through what you went through. She had her parents from the same exact background and you worked with her. You grew so close to her that only the case drew you apart. Look, I know for a fact you love her...why don't you try to tell her how you feel." Her replies softly.

"You are obviously not listening to what I am saying...Last night was the night we were intimate...we got closer and with that she turns around and throws a hissy fit..."

"I really don't think that is what ticked you off...What are you hiding Alexandra?" he asks me.

"Nothing...I tried to get through to her and she has the nerve to call Olivia and then she comes to my office and tells me once again that she and Olivia are going to lunch. I didn't need to know that...Ugh...I hate this day...We haven't talked since." I reply angrily.

"Ahh...I see...You are jealous that you do not have her all to yourself." He replies smiling.

"No..." I realize that there is no point in refuting the truth. "Yes...Ugh...Casey could have so much better. So much. I can comfort her. I can be there for her. I can be the one she calls, but I am not. I sometimes feel that I am that girl on the side to her...Not her lover or...I just feel that I get the short end of the stick. I try hard...and Olivia...Olivia just has a stupid job that cares about more that her girlfriend...I would know." I reply harshly.

I lean back on the chair and shut my eyes. I just need some rest.

"You think that she doesn't see you the way you see her?" he asks once again.

"I don't know what I think...I hear one thing and see something else...I really don't what to talk anymore." I reply leaning my head on the chair.

"Well, we do have thirty minutes. Tell me about work." He asks in his softly professional voice.

"It wasn't that great either...Look, how about I leave here at least semi-happy. I can't stand feeling like this..." I reply frustrated.

"Ok...Where do you see yourself in 5 years?" He asks.

I look at him, "Well, I would love to become a DA...I would love to have been married to the woman of my dreams. I would love to do a lot of things that I know that I might not accomplish...I don't have the motivation for any of that anymore. I am just going to dig it out till the end...I want to move away...I have made a fool of myself and I hate this feeling..." My voice cracks a little bit.

"What do you mean dig it out to the end?" he asks as he writes stuff down.

"Either I die doing this job or retire and die...either way I am already dead inside...Casey is with Olivia right now...and I am spending my day talking to a doctor...I should be with her...holding her...Kissing her...showing her she is loved." I shrug, "It doesn't matter because she is engaged and I am a loser who thought I had something more with her...turns out I loved her more that she ever could give me credit for."

"You are talking in past tense...are you both over?" he asks writing more down.

"I don't know...am I done?" I ask standing up.

"You have five more minutes...but we can cut this short." He smiled. "I want to see you once again this week...understood?" He asked me.

I nod. "Ok." I walk out of the office. I feel a little bit better talking these things out, but will this ever work...Casey and I? I want to give up...I want to just throw in the towel but thinking about that moment we shared yesterday has to say something about our relationship...right?

I head home and sleep. Not know what the next day is going to bring.

I wake up to my alarm clock. All I want today is for Casey to admit that she was wrong...I think today I will tell her that I love her...I know it is way too early...but I have to play all my cards or else I will lose all my money to Olivia.

I head to my office and greet my assistant before walking in.

After thirty minutes of working, someone knocks on my door.

"Come in." I project my voice. I see Casey and go back to doing my work. She locks the door and places flowers on my desk.

"I am sorry." She speaks up.

I pick up the flowers and smell them and place them in a vase. "Thank you." I tell her.

"I am so sorry about yesterday. I don't know what came over me." She hugs me then leans in to kiss me. That just reassures that the feelings I have with her are mutual.

She stares deep within my eyes, "Are we ok now?"

I nod, "Yea, It took you long enough." I smile.

"Hey, you are hard enough to get and you are making me try this hard to please you? That is just cruel."

We both chuckle.

I lead her to the sofa. I feel like now is the time to tell her, "I..."

"Do you have water?" She interrupts me.

I nod and get her a bottle from her fridge.

"Thank you." She replies.

"Casey, I have to tell you that I am in love with you." I begin. "I guess what I am trying to say…" I breath in... "I love you. I have felt this for a long time…"

She spits out her water and starts choking...not what I envisioned in my mind.

**AN: What do you think? :)**


	8. Predator and Prey

**AN: I am sadly a procrastinator and still haven't made a schedule and I hope I make one soon...lol. Enjoy!**

Then, my spirit is torn down, "Why did you tell me this? Now of all times Alex. This changes everything!" She replies. She turns away from me. "I don't understand. Why? Was this a moment for that? I just came to give you flowers. You screwed this up, Alex." She continues.

I am hurt. I feel like she just made up with me to break me down again. "Get out Casey! You are really bitchy you know that. You are rude and compared to me, you are diminutive and scared. Scared to show your feelings for me. At what cost, Casey? What cost? I feel like I am the only one trying, you just shut people out. What is wrong with you? Get out!" I get up and walk to my desk. I am more heartbroken than angry.

She can't hide her feelings from me. I just have to wait.

"I…can't do this Alex! I am thinking of the future. Alex, if I don't choose you, I am going to feel like shit because I led you to love me and you are left with nothing. I hate this, you know. I can't…" She speaks up and I ignore her, until I hear what I want to hear. "Something that I always hate about you is that you can keep composed in a hard situation and I can't."

I pay no attention to her and she kneels beside my chair. "Alex look at me. Alex!"

"What?" I reply harshly.

"I love you, too. I loved you since you came to my apartment," I smile and I see her expression change. "I just hate this…I hate it so much." She replies leaning up to kiss me.

"I hate your big mouth." I whisper to her.

"I hate it, too." She stands up. "Today, Olivia is going to be at work all day…I was wondering if…we can go to your house and…"

"Sure. Around 7:30, I have arraignments and court." I smile. Finally, she comes to her senses.

"It's a date?" She asks to confirm.

"Yes, Casey. Now, go to your office before someone thinks something is up." I reply to her.

"Can you say those three words again? It has a nice ring to it." She pulls me to stand up and grabs me by my waist.

"I hate you?" I reply chuckling.

"Hey! The other one, it starts with _I love…" _She smiles.

"I love you." I finally tell her. She smiles.

"I love you, too." She leans to kiss me.

"I'll see you later?" She asks walking away.

"Yep, now go." I reply.

Now I know she feels the same for me that I do her. I think I want to get on the same plate as Olivia. I am going to ask her to marry me. I know this all so early, but I love her and love has no bounds. I love her with all my heart and I want to spend the rest of my life with her.

I call a florist and he tells me to call him back after seven thirty and I also called a jewelry store who told me to come in tomorrow to look at rings. I am excited. I just hope Casey would love it and accept it.

After arraignment I head to Casey's assistants desk. I want tonight to be great.

"Hey...does Casey have anything she loves to eat?" I ask her.

"Yea. Let me give you the number and what she orders. She eats this stuff like every day. I think she is addicted to it." Her assistant smiles and hands me the paper.

"Thank you." I reply heading to Casey's Office.

I knock. "Come in." she yells.

I enter to see her on the phone. She signals me to sit.

"Is this dangerous? What case is it?" she speaks into the phone.

"OK, Thanks." She shuts her phone and smiles, "Ready to go?"

"What was that about?" I ask kind of concerned.

She stands up and I follow her, "Olivia is undercover…"

I love this between us. I ordered the food and she will be so excited.

**My House**

I entered my home and noticed Casey staring at my home. "I inherited this from my mother. She past when I was in witness protection." I told her trying to hold tears.

"I brought Chinese." I head to the kitchen and grab the both boxes and hand her the one with her name on it.

I watch her open it. She looks surprised. "How did you know this was my favorite?"

I smile as I am so proud of myself. "You order it every day. Your assistant tells me you can't stop yourself."

She smiles. I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with her and I love her. I don't care if we felt this about each other in a short amount of time.

Once we are done, we cuddle next to each other. I grab her hand and lean on her.

"It is weird." I tell her.

"What's weird?" she asks.

"Our relationship. I never in my life thought I would do something this heinous. Especially, against Olivia. I…I am pretty sure we didn't mean for this to happen. It did, and as much as I feel like the most terribl-est person ever, I feel so right with you." I reply.

"I love you. I hate that I do…I mean I love you, but I don't want to hurt you…It sucks, really bad." She remarks.

"I love you, too. Let's live in the here and now." I look up at her and smile.

"You are annoying." She replies and has the cutest and sexiest smile on.

I playfully push myself off of her.

"Hey! Don't push me," She tells me pushing me back.

I start having a laughing fit, "I didn't push you." I tell her. Sadly, I lean to push her back and I miss and she laughs at me.

I hate getting humiliated and I push her when she least expects it. The problem is that I put in too much strength and I pushed her off the couch.

Shit.

"Oww,what was that?" She asks kind of hurt and kind of joking.

I quickly run to my bedroom. She follows me in.

"Ok, Casey stop, stop! I am sorry for pushing you." I tell her to detour her from getting at me.

I like this game. I feel like I am prey and she is the predator. She is so adorable right now. I swear I could have her right this moment.

**AN: Hello...Yum this is going to get interesting. :) What is on your minds? :) **


	9. Intimate

**AN: Long time no update…FF had a glitch and Finally my account is working.**

"You pushed me off the chair," She looks surprised and her expression is priceless.

"And I am sorry for that." I reply lifting my hands in surrender.

She starts to move closer, then my life flashes before my eyes because she pins me down to the bed.

"Ok, now, I just want to say, that was very naughty of you to push me." She is smiling like she won.

Alexandra Cabot doesn't lose. So I continue to try to extricate my wrists from her grasps. "Casey, I am sorry." I am still trying to get out of her grasps.

She just stares into my eyes, and leans to kiss me. She slowly lets my hands slip and I move my hands towards her back.

She quickly helps me out of my shirt and I do the same. It felt so fast yet so slow.

Our bodies touching like an electric shock…it just felt so right.

She leaned and gently laid kisses on the crook of my neck, the sensation caused a moan to escape my lips. "Mmm…" She continues to kiss me.

I move my hands to unhook her bra and I put my weight on my foot and end up on top of her and smiles as she unhooks my bra.

I start to kiss her on the neck. They were slow deliberate kisses.

"Alex…" She moaned softly.

I love hearing my name come out of her lips. I smile against her skin.

I slowly move towards her breast. I let my tongue sway back and forth and sucking her nipple.

"Uhmmm," she mumbles something incoherently.

She quickly starts taking off the articles of clothing on her. She is so beautiful naked. I quickly discard of my clothes, too.

"Alex, I want you now."

I lean to kiss her on her lips. "Slow down, babe." I tug at her bottom lip.

She reaches and grabs my breasts and cups them in her hand.

I want to please her so I move to her breast. A whimper escapes her lips. I place kisses strategically moving towards her pussy.

"Ummm." She starts to moan.

Mmm…I hit the jackpot…I reach her clit. I start to suck it and place two fingers inside of her. Knowing she need me I start thrusting faster and faster.

"Alex…" She softly moans.

I smile and I move my tongue in circles on her clit as I continue to thrust inside of her. I do it gently. I know she is just waiting to explode. She looks so beautiful and she doesn't have to be in control. She has to only think of me. I continue to thrust faster and faster making circle movements with my tongue faster. I know she will climax any moment. I can feel her walls clasp of my fingers.

"Oh My Gosh!"She screams as her back arches.

Her whole body trembling under my fingers.

I slowly remove my fingers and straddle her.

"You are great." She tells me out of breath.

I lean to kiss her.

Now she does a maneuver. I smile at her attempt. She heads for my neck and lands on my breast. She sucks on them.

I softly moan.

She start to kiss me on my lips and massages my breasts with her left hand. She moans in my mouth and travels back to my breast leaving a trail of wet kisses down my neck.

She heads straight to my pussy but avoids my clit as much as possible. Reaching every crevice she can find.

I know she wants me to beg for it…."Casey, please."

I know she knows what I want she wants me to give in to her and beg and plead. She lifts up her head and smiles. For a second there, seeing her smile just makes me want to fulfill her every need…

She finally starts on my clit and lets her tongue pass through it. "Please, Casey." I beg her one again.

She sucks my clit, and that affects me in all places.

"Casey!" I scream he name as my orgasm comes in like a flood.

She kisses her way up to my lips and let go when we each need a breath. She continues to kiss me and massage my breasts. I moan as she makes her way back to her lips. She licks my lips.

She mounts herself off of me. "That was crazy good." I tell her.

She smiles, "You're the one who is talented."

I chuckle. She turns to face me. This feeling is overwhelming I love her so much.

She grabs the comforter and places it over us. I turn so that the back of my head is under her chin, on her neck.

I entangle my fingers into hers, over my stomach. "I love you, Casey." I tell her as a yawn escapes my lips.

She kisses the top of my head, "I love you, too."


	10. Under The Desk

**AN: I tried didn't edit AAM yet but I will try to post third chapter tmrw :)**

**Doctors Office**

I feel like I haven't been here in a long time. Nevertheless, I go to vent.

I enter the office and I am required to wait a while because he is running late.

After about thirty minutes he comes in smiling.

"How are you doing Alex?" He asked me.

I smiled, "Fine. Great." I answer thinking about last night.

"Well, in your last visit we talked about Casey. You were angry with her. You said that maybe you are over. What has happened? Are you still with Casey? Found someone new?" He asks.

"Well, she and I were intimate with each other yesterday. Gosh, I love her more that life itself. I want to marry her. I just have to find the right time to plan it. She will love every second of it."

He smiled, "I am glad you are happy…but Alex…Are you ashamed this is the way you have to do it. You are causing a relationship to go south. She is engaged. Have you placed those factors in?" He asked.

"I have and she has also. She knows the graveness of our situation, but we love each other and that is what counts. Of course I feel like shit sometimes. I feel like I am the worst person in the world. But when I am with her I can fly, I can do whatever I want because she will be there to catch me." I answer.

"Do you feel guilty?" He asks writing things down.

I stare at the floor. "I have these dreams. Where I am marrying Casey but Olivia comes and finds us and starts crying and Casey goes running back to her. It's the fact that I have been hiding my feelings for so long that hurts me. I know it is going to kill me to see her marry Olivia. I may be depressed. I don't want her to make a decision on my reaction. I want her to check her heart and see who is better in her life." I answer him

"Ok, What about Olivia?" He asks writing more down.

"I loved her once. I hurt her. I didn't plan this to hurt her or anybody else. I hate myself for hurting her and once she left me I felt like nothing and it hurt. I don't want Casey to think I am with her because Olivia and I have a past. I am sorry for what Casey and I are causing Olivia, but from what I hear, Casey and Olivia are distant…But I am in no way condoning cheating or any or that sort…Love finds people in tough situations." I answer him.

"Do you love her?" He asks smiling.

I smile back and nod my head. "Very much."

"What about her-"

"Do I love?" I interrupt him.

He nods and smiles.

"Everything. From the way she sleeps, to…She sometimes stares at me when she thinks and I think it's the cutest thing. She says sorry for no reason. She sends the cutest texts, yet so simple. Like _have a nice day _or _I love and miss you_." I smile as I continue, "Before she sleeps she yawns twice and shuts one lamp, because she says she doesn't like the dark. Her kisses, her hugs, her smile, her voice…her everything." I answer shrugging.

He nods, "Does anybody besides you two know about this relationship?" He asks.

"You but besides that no." I reply.

"Are you happy?" He asks.

I nod. "Yes. I have never been happier."

"Do you think I'm crazy?" I ask him.

"Do you think you're crazy?" He answers back.

"Crazy in love…I vowed to myself that I wouldn't do something like this…here I am doing it." I tell him.

"We ran out of time…But, Let me tell you this, Think about your priorities in life and chose what is important. Maybe the questions you have unanswered will answer themselves." He smiles.

I nod and head out to my car to go to work. Once there, I head for Casey's Office. I haven't seen her all day, and after talking about her all day, I just want to see her smile and just talk.

I ask her secretary if she's in and she nods so I head to her office and she opens the door before I knock.

"Going somewhere?" I ask her smiling. She quickly locks the door and grabs hold of me and pulls me closer.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you. I thought I was going to go see you, maybe to clear my mind." She smiles.

"This is more like it, Counselor. I like this side of you." I continue, "I actually couldn't stop thinking about you either. It was so hard not to…after yesterday" I lean in to kiss her. I move my arms over her shoulder.

She moves me closer to deepen the kiss. I stop the kiss for air, "We have to get back to work. Stop squeezing my…" I turned towards the door.

I think I just heard Elliot. Casey looks at me in panic and lets me go.

"Hey, Casey. I need to talk to you." Elliot states through the door. He is knocking loudly.

"Elliot…not right now. I am working." She answers in annoyance.

I just think this is the funniest thing so cover my mouth as I am chuckling.

She gives me this stern look. Like a parent would give to a child. She was warning me not to make a sound.

"Casey, it's important. It's about Olivia." He replies with urgency in his voice.

Well, I know that I am not going under that desk again so she can forget all about that idea.

"Ok, hold on." She tells him. She looks at me and points to the desk.

I word to her, no.

Besides wanting her to beg I want to see her cute pouty face. She tells me again and clasps her hand pleading for me to go under the desk. Of course I would do anything for her.

I smile and nonchalantly disappear behind the desk.

I hear her footsteps towards the door.

She opens it and Elliot rushes in. "I think you should lock that door."

Uh-oh. This is bad.

**AN: What do you think?**


	11. Proposal

**AN: This chapter is cute…I think :)**

I hear her pause and sit down carefully to avoid hitting me.

"I know…" Elliot sounds angry.

What? Does he see me under the desk? Eww… She really needs to broom under here.

"You know what?" Casey asks him.

"I know about you and Alex…"

Ever had that feeling when your heart stops beating, just for a second, and hope to God that you are ok…Well that is what I am feeling now.

How could he know? Casey and I are cautious aboutus. I cannot lose her now! I need more time. I have not even planned my proposal. I have not even brought the ring.

"I don't follow?" She finally tells him.

He pauses for a few seconds. "You are telling me, you don't follow? Don't give me that."

Casey starts shifting in her chair. She is so nervous.

"I really don't know what you are talking about." Her voice cracks a little.

"There is no hiding this…" He tells her.

"Ok, I guess there isn't." She answers. What does she mean there isn't? I hit her leg.

"I don't know why you are trying to hide this. Everyone knows that you don't like Alex."

What a relief! I see Casey relax and breathe.

I find myself somewhat disappointed.

"I know…I am trying to fix that." She pauses, "You know Alex, she is so spoiled and a brat. She cannot keep her hands to herself. She screws people over..."

I hit her smiling.

"What does that have to do with you?" She asks.

"Olivia thinks you are still jealous of Alex. She told me the other night…"

"I think this is so funny how Olivia tells _you_ all this stuff and she doesn't speak to me. I really need you out of my business. I do not care what you think. If Olivia wants to tell me something, she will. Where is she?" Well, there goes happy Casey.

"Look, I just don't want her to get hurt, ok. She loves you and she hates how you are so distant from her lately. She thinks is because of the time she invited Alex to your house…"

"Elliot…look, I like you as a detective, but as a person you are very annoying. I will talk to her later if that helps you. Please, get out of our business." She sounds annoyed.

"Ok. I am out of your business." I hear him walk out the door.

Once she locks the door, I crawl out and dust off myself. This place is disgusting.

She turns to look at me with her face saddened. I decide to lighten up the mood. "That is the last time I am being shoved under a desk. Next time you come to my office."

However, to no avail she did not crack a smile, "Yea." She sits at her desk and I sit in the seat across from her.

She is obviously thinking of Olivia and I should give her space, for now. "Look, if you want to talk to Olivia…I understand. I'll see you later."

"I actually…I really don't want to see her right now." She places her hand on her face.

She looks depressed. "Casey, you have a lot on your mind. Why do not we go out for lunch at Jake's and relax a little bit. It will be great for you. The fresh air..." I ask her smiling.

"I would love that," We kiss each other and head out.

**Jake's **

We just finished our lunch and Casey did not move so we just stayed seated.

"Hey, what are you thinking?" I bring her out of her thoughts.

"A bunch of things…"

"Would you like more Sprite?" The waiter interrupted.

Casey nods.

The waiter smiles, pours, and walks away.

Certain things you do not realize and you take for granted is the person you are with because they can be yanked away from you any minute. I look into her emerald green eyes and imagine myself getting down on one knee.

"_Casey Novak, will you do the honors of marrying me." _or take a more chilled approach,_ "Hey babe, I got a box and only one answer you can give."_ Maybe a romantic approach, with lots of flowers…She deserves it all.

"What?" Casey asks as she drags me out of my thoughts.

"Nothing…just… you are beautiful." I smile at her.

"Thanks, you are not too shabby yourself." She smiles until she suddenly looks at her phone and her expression is filled with a mixture of anger and hatred. I hate seeing that pained look on her face.

"Who was that?" I ask her. Know all too well that it was Olivia.

"Nothing…so you're ready?" She asks changing the subject.

I shrugged, "Ok. Let's go."

Once we head to the car and we are situated, I ask her, "So… you are not going to tell me who made you so pissed all of a sudden?"

"I really don't want to…" She answers.

I am just hoping she does not shut me out like before.

"Casey…come on…I love to listen…just vent…it will make you feel better…I promise." I assure her.

"Ok…Olivia texted me…to see her…I just…I'm not in the mood to be talking to her right now. I do not want to fight right now. I just want to relax." She shuts her eyes and lays back.

"How about we both head back to work? You can clear your head and I will finish up my motions…then we can talk about what you want to do…sound cool." I tell her as we arrive at work.

I head straight for my office and finish a couple of cases and motions I needed to finish.

Then, I do it. I take out articles I found on proposing. I have my computer open on a selection of rings. I want the biggest and one that resembles Casey's beauty, and personality.

I found a couple I liked and wrote down the address of the jewelry store. I soon got preoccupied with how I am going to propose to her. Will I do it in a few weeks, today, or tomorrow?

I love her and it would not matter the day or time…unless Olivia is off.

My phone rings.

"Cabot." I answer.

"Delivery." My assistant told me.

"Send it up." I tell her before hanging up.

A couple minutes after a man comes in with 3 dozen roses and a box full of white chocolates.

I placed the roses in the vase. "Thank you." I read the card. "I wonder who sent these…" I tell the deliveryman who obviously just wanted me to sign so he can leave.

He left quickly. I shut the door.

Even better, reading proposing articles while eating white chocolate.

Here is one article, "Setting Up a Proposal." Well the first step is picking a venue. I can be somewhere romantic or a place that has a lot of meaning, like a first kiss, where you said I love you, etc.

Ok, sounds easy. I will choose somewhere romantic.

I head to the computer and search romantic places in New York.

I hear a knock on my door, "I am busy." I yell out going back to the computer and shoving pieces of chocolate in my mouth.

"It's Casey…" I hear her voice and I smile.

"Oh…hold on." Oh shit…I grab all the papers on my desk, shove them in my desk, and shut down the computer.

I walk to the door and open it. My heart actually flutters every time I see her and I hope it never ceases to flutter for her.

**AN: What do you think? The proposal? Olivia and Casey's relationship?**


	12. The Vacation

**AN: Totally appreciate everyone's reviews :) Make me happy. Well then, read on.**

"Hey," She smiles as she locks the door, "You have a little something on your cheeks. Let me get that." She reaches out to clean something off my face.

"Someone one sent me these flowers. It says '_thank you.'_ They must really know me to get me white chocolate, right?" I inform her.

She suddenly get this sly smile on her face, "I actually sent that to you. I want to thank you for getting me off probation."

I am surprised she even remembered...Wait I don't think I ever told her, "Casey, thank you. You didn't have to do this…"

She hugs me and smiles, "I just wanted to thank you…for everything. You made my day."

"Aww, the flowers smell beautiful. Thank you." She brings me to the sofa.

"Welcome…I actually have to tell you something…" She loses the smile and I actually start to get worried.

I withhold a tear that tries to escape as I think the worse. What if she is breaking up with me? What am I to do?

"What?" Is all I can drag out.

"I am going on vacation…with Olivia…next week…" She pauses.

I can't stand the thought of my redhead on vacation with Olivia. I fell so depressed now… I do not know why? Maybe because of the impending break up I will receive once she comes back.

"I love you…as much as I do…I want to see where Olivia and I stand. Whether it is staying engaged or over…I plan on telling her about us…" She assures me.

I smile on the inside, "Did you talk to her?"

"Yeah, a couple hours ago…she came to my office…She…"

"You don't have to explain anything to me…I am the one who is helping you cheat…so if you want to hang with your fiancé, I totally get it." I interrupt her and roam my thumb over her knuckles.

"Thanks. Look Olivia is not going to be home tonight so we can go to your house…"

"Yea, let me grab some chocolates and we will be on our way." I get up, head to my desk, and place the articles in my bag.

"Let me head to my office. And grab some stuff. You really like that stuff, huh?"

"Yea." I smiled.

**My House**

Once I get home…I just want to talk about her decision to tell Olivia. I am more that excited…I am eccentric, delirious, and just plain happy, that Casey decided to tell Olivia. One step closer to my redheads heart.

"Can we finish what we started at your office?" I ask her and I stand up from the couch.

"We can do whatever you want." She has this huskiness to her voice, more sensual and lustful, than normal. She pulls me in close, slowly lets her hand trail down my back, and places her forehead on mines.

"So you are really going to tell Olivia about us?" I ask her again, "you don't think she will go crazy?"

"I don't know…it's scary…I know it's going to hurt her, but its better that I tell her than she finding out herself." She obviously has something else in mind as she leans to kiss me.

I really want to talk about this, and even though I love the kiss, I break it."You think we would have a chance…I mean, you think she will forgive you?"

She moves me towards the wall. "I think that we should forget about it until it happens." Her eyes are full of lust and she starts kissing my neck.

"mmm…it affects me….mmm…case…stop….stop…" I squirm.

"This is such a great moment and you ruin it because you are a little nosy. I hate dating Lawyers…they always ask questions." She finds this as a fun game, not a serious conversation, so she leans in a kiss me again.

"You hate yourself? Look can we just talk…" I gaze at the floor.

She lets it go, but when I look up, she has this puzzled look on, "Talk about what? How much we love each other? How much we mean to one another?"

I glare at her.

"Ok…we can '_talk_'." She isn't happy about it, however it is important to me.

I take her hand and lead her to the bedroom. I signal her to get in. She faces me.

Then the though hits me, if she and Olivia are going on a vacation…then I must propose before Olivia can take her from me. I need to order that ring and get everything together before…

I hear Casey mumble, "Ok…are you getting on the bed?" I heard it, but my thoughts are on proposing to my love.

"Alex!" Casey snaps at me.

"Sorry, I forgot to do something. It can wait…" Startled, I quickly got in bed and laid on her chest…Where I feel warm and secure.

"Ok…what is up?" she acquiesces.

"Olivia…look I just want to say that you are being placed in a tough spot. You are brave. I don't want you to get hurt by all this if it was essentially my fault." I worriedly explain.

**Week Later**

Today is the day that Casey leaves on vacation. Not only do I have to do double the casework, I have to spend a whole week without my redhead. I did not think it was possible that I can stand a week without her, better yet a day.

I have yet to go to my psychologist and I have an appointment today. I obviously have to mentally prepare myself, if he inquires about my relationship with Casey. I do not think I am ready for the prodding, but I can be.

I have not talked to Casey about my appointments and she should know. Maybe, just maybe, I can cease my sessions with Dr. Grey once Casey and I are together.

I did not get to say my goodbye to Casey and it is weird being in my office without her popping her head in… or me walking down the hall to see her.

Once I am done with my cases, I head to Dr. Grey's office.

He looks like he has been waiting for me. I breathe in and shut the door behind me.

I fix my glasses above my nose and take a seat. This time I will let him lead. I will speak only when I want to.

"Long time no see." He smiles slightly.

I nod.

"Well, what do you have on your mind?" He asks.

"Casey." I answer.

He glares at me, imploring me to go on. "What about Casey?" he finally speaks.

"I miss her," I breathe shakily.

"Oh…you are not together anymore?" he asks slowly and with caution.

I lift my hands and wave them, "No…nothing like that…She went on vacation with Olivia…"

He nods and scribbles something on his pad. "How do you feel about Casey and Olivia alone… together…on vacation?" He asks.

"Well," I guess speaking in one worded sentences went out the door, "I hate it…I wish she was only mine…but that's not my reality…Look, I already hate coming here, and you giving me these harsh glances, make it worse…I know you don't approve of my relationship with Casey…but you can't choose who you fall in love with." I breathe in and I rise to exit the short-lived conversation.

"Alex…It is not my place to judge, only to listen and please sit down." His voice was inviting but he did not crack a smile, however I sat back down to endure his line of questioning like a perp that the SVU squad would tear apart.

The session went by in a timely manner and I departed slightly happier. I spoke about my plan to ask Casey to marry me once she comes back.

As I exit the building and head to the parking lot, Casey calls.

I fumble between my keys at hand and the phone and place it in my ear.

"Hey, Lex. It's me Casey."

My heart is rapidly beating outside my chest and I try to contain my happiness.

"Oh, hey," I shut the door to the car as I enter in. "I already miss you." I smile even though she cannot see it.

"I miss you too. We just arrived. Olivia is sleeping. I am hoping we get enough strength to do something today…" her voice is quivering.

"What's going on? Are you afraid? Your voice…it's a little shaky" I tell her.

"I don't know…I am afraid to tell her…how would that make you feel? Hey we are on vacation and I tell you I am cheating…doesn't sound like what a _normal _person plans…"

"Hey, you will be great just…tell her how you feel…I haven't been to Florida in this time of year…is it beautiful?" I try to change the subject.

I hear a muffled, "Hey, who are you talking to?" I know that it was Olivia's voice.

"Hey, look I will call you later about the case. Alright…bye." Without a word from me she shuts the phone off abruptly.

**AN: What do you think? Like?**


	13. Planes

**AN: It's been a month since update :O … I'll make it up to you :)**

By the end of this week Casey will have told Olivia about us and will have made her decision.

I have to get everything ready. My proposal, I mean. Although, I don't know where I should ask her, I have everything prepared. I want her to be surprised.

I will give her a bunch of roses and while she is still stunned I will appear on one knee and ask.

The one flaw in this plan is that I don't know if Casey is going to choose me or if she will even say yes, but those flaws are clouded with my excitement.

I have never been so in love with someone and I certainly did not see myself sharing my love with anyone else.

I picked out the diamond ring while Casey was at work last week. I couldn't believe how beautifully a ring can look. I knew I had to get it. The saleswoman kept nagging me that there are more she would like me to look at before I make a decision but this is the one I want. It's elegant yet not too showy, because I know Casey likes everything plain and simple.

All this planning makes me ponder that maybe I am the only one who really cares about this relationship. I placed my heart and my all on the line, and I don't know what I would do If I lost her…I would be happy for her, I would love her, however I would hurt.

I would probably have no reason to live; because I want Casey so bad…I hate that I kept my feelings to myself all this time. I hate that I was so scared to tell her that I loved her.

I just have to live on hope, hope that I have taken her heart and that she trusts me with it.

I also will have to eventually tell her about my past relationship with Olivia. I hope she understands why I did It and that It has no correlation with our relationship.

I head back to my office and I can't stop thinking about Casey and our relationship.

I decide to call her, just to check on her and to keep myself sane.

"Hey..." She sounds so sad and distraught and I could hear her sobbing.

"Casey? What the hell happened? I can hear you sniffling." Of course I am worried. I will fly over there right now. If Olivia did something to her, I will make sure Olivia never see's Casey's face again.

"Um...I..." She is trying to tell me why she is crying but she pauses. I can hear her cry once again. My heart is clenching and all I can think of is why is my baby crying.

"What is going on? Casey!" I am so anxious and worried. Why is she crying?

"I told...Olivia..." She continues to cry and I just let out a sigh of relief…Now I don't have to make good on my threat to Olivia.

"Oh my gosh, sweetie. I thought you were going to wait until Saturday?" Why didn't she wait…She has to make a decision after spending time with Olivia. Now that whole concept is ruined…how she going to make her choice now?

"Alex, stop acting like you care...you wanted this to happen all along..." She sounds accusatory. I do not want her thinking like that. I wouldn't want her to feel an ounce of sadness. She needs someone there with her, comforting her.

"Acting like I care? Look, Case...where are you? I can come in a couple hours..." I start to walk out of the office and tell my assistant, I am leaving early.

"NO! Alex, just stop...leave me alone...I didn't think that it would hurt this bad... letting her go. Telling her I am one of those idiots on the street... cheating on their girl...she trusted me, Alex, damn it! How can you trust me...how do you know I won't cheat on you?" She hates herself, but she shouldn't.

"Casey, calm down. I trust you because you trust me. I know your heart. You didn't mean to do what you did. Our hearts just have different ways of telling you..."

"Telling me what? That I am with the wrong person?...give me a break..." I hear her continue to cry.

I don't want to push her any more than I want to, "You need some space. I will call you later. Ok?" I was about to tell her I love her but she shut the phone off.

One thing I know is everything happens for a reason, I still head to the private airport my father owns and while there I come up with the craziest idea.

From years of knowing Olivia, I know that she wouldn't want anything to do with a cheater. This gives me more leeway and more of a chance to ask Casey to marry me. I send for a couple of men, dressed in tuxes and I ordered the flowers.

Everything was finally ready. They were just waiting for the go head, but there is a chance Casey will not want me to come.

After a few hours I get a call from Casey, which makes my heart skip a beat.

"Hey, Alex. Sorry about earlier..." She trails off. She sounds like she is feeling better.

"Hey, and it's ok. How are you doing?" I ask her softly.

"You said you can come down here..."She changes the subject.

"Yea, I can be on my way right now. I actually took the liberty to wait at my dad's launch pad. I can arrive in 2 hours." I reply to her signaling everyone that everything is in order.

"Ok. Good." She answers before shutting the phone.

As I am entering the plane, I start to wonder why she decided to call me now, what made her change her mind.

I never liked planes…My parents always traveled with me by car. I am not deadly afraid of them, I just hate turbulence, but I would do anything for Casey, no matter the situation.

For the next two hours I am just overly jittery and anxious, wondering what will await me when I land. Is this going to be Casey's decision? Or she just wants my comfort…however, by that phone call, she seemed distant.

I just hope she knows I love her more than anything else, and hopefully, I captured her heart like she captured mine.

**AN: What do you think?**


	14. The Decision

**AN: This is almost the end…Read on :)**

* * *

Once I arrive, there is a car waiting for me. I gave him the directions a Casey sent them to me and when I go there is see Olivia entering. She looks distraught.

"Stay here, unless I give you the signal." I tell the men as I exit the car.

I enter the beach house and I am so excited to see Casey that I kiss her. She told me to sit and I am guessing it is decision time. I am seated across from Olivia. I can't even express how heated and depressed she appears.

She is staring at me like I killed one of her family members. She has to understand that I didn't mean for this to happen…and what happens if she brings up our past, and my mistake? I don't know what Casey would think…

"I just want to really thank you, Olivia for coming." Casey sits down. "Ok...Olivia can you please tell me about the Alex _you _know...I can't...I want to know what really happened between you both." Once those words leave her mouth…I am hyperventilating…but I try to keep calm. I know I have made mistakes in the past, and I wish I could have told her…so she would understand.

Olivia looks down, "I broke up with Alex. I moved on...she didn't...I started dating Abbie...Alex somehow got into Abbie's head and Abbie cheated on me...It sucks to happen twice you know...especially someone you were about to marry...I made amends with Alex a couple years later. She told me that she couldn't get over me and now she is...I believed her and I wanted you two to be friends...I was hoping she would give you tips or something..." Olivia replies sobbing.

Just tell the truth.

Casey stares at me like I betrayed her, and what I fell for her is so real and I don't want us to end.

"Casey, I did those things...no denying it. I am way over Olivia. I seriously love you and care about you...more than you will ever know. I have done stupid things in the past..."

Before I can finish my sentence, Oliva straddles me and she slapped me a couple times…Maybe I deserved it, but I couldn't even fight back, she pinned down my hand with her knees…Yes, I thought I was going to die

"You don't love her like I do Alex. You are a conniving bitch!" Olivia had anger in her voice.

"Stop!" I hear Casey yell and Olivia is pulled off of me.

Casey looks at my face and I turn away.

"I am going to get ice. Please, be womanlike." Casey pleads as she walks into the kitchen.

Olivia grazed her face with her hands and leaned back.

Casey returned and just slammed the ice on my hand. I have to explain to her that I didn't use her.

"I love you, Casey. I really do. This is _not_ some personal vendetta I have against Olivia, I swear. I knew I had to have you the moment I saw you. Then I found out Olivia was your five year girlfriend and now fiancé...I just saw what I wanted and I had to have it." Please believe me, Case. I hope she does.

She stares at both Olivia and I and begins, "Lately, Olivia...we have drifted apart...I know you say we are over and I understand...You trusted me and I let you down. Being a part of this mess... I have to say that... I promise to never cheat on someone else as long as I live. I am human... I have needs...Nothing excuses what I did to you. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. I love you and I always will...but my heart lies with Alex Cabot,"

First my heart skipped a beat and then it just started beating faster and faster as I just realize what she had said.

When Dr. Grey asked me _'what if I wasn't chosen?'_ All I could think about is not having Casey in my life and I felt distraught. The idea of helping her to cheat and feeling guilty about it, paid off somehow and now I am with the love of my life, or close to spending forever with her.

Olivia looked like she saw this coming. "I love her...She has become my best friend...my lover...my..." She starts tearing, "I never really stopped to admire her. After a walk, I really knew that she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I am done hiding my feelings for her. I never intended to hurt you. I just want you to somehow be happy for me Olivia."

Ok, I am shocked. Casey is telling Olivia how much she love me.

Olivia shoots up, "Have a nice life." She walks out the door.

Casey gets up to catch up to her.

This is my chance, I head out the back door and head to the car. "Everything is set."

I enter back into the house as Casey just enters.

"Alex?"

I tap her on the shoulder.

She turns around with a confused look on her face.

"Stand right here. I wanted to do this in New York...but you planned a vacation. Now, that I am chosen...I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want this to be perfect." I leave through the door and grab one rose and wait until all the men have done their jobs and when I enter, Casey is speechless.

Then Alex comes in with a rose. "A rose reminds me of you...Delicate, serene, a gracious scent...It may prick your finger." I rehearsed this in my head so many times that I hope what I want to say comes out right.

Aww, my Casey is crying, "But hey, that comes with a relationship. I am willing to live through it. I know this may be hasty, but I have planned this day since we both said I love you. I love you and I truly want to spend the rest of my life with you, Case."

I open the box and lift I as high as I can. "I fought for you and I won...kind of...I wasn't really thinking of get slapped around." We both laugh.

"I guess what I am really trying to say is, Will you marry me, Casey Novak?" I am trying to hold the tears back, she just looks so beautiful.

"Yes." She replies sobbing once more.

I get off the ground and remove the rose and put the ring on her finger. I can't believe she said yes. I move in close to kiss the love of my life.

* * *

**AN: I ****see that you want a marriage…Well I guess that will be the last chapter then :) So next chapter is the marriage :)**


	15. The Wedding

**AN: This is the wedding chapter everyone wanted. Sorry it took soooooooo long but I think is at least worthy, hopefully. Well enjoy.**

* * *

Weddings such as mine tend to be controversial. People across the nation still are conflicted about it. Mainly some discuss it when a policy comes up, or during an election and others rather pretend such things do not exist. Then there are the people who think everyone should be equal.

Aren't all weddings the same? You tell your soon to be husband or wife (in my case) how much you love them and plan to be with them forever.

You have these expectations, about how the wedding should go and most of the time it never goes as planned because most of us do not know what the future brings. You could be stating your vows and either your fiancé's or your ex expresses that, she or he, is still in love with you and you are making a massive mistake. Maybe someone spoke because they weren't at peace. The worse? When your spouse leaves you at the altar (not that we are getting married in a church) and you are there either crying, shocked, or both.

All these things could go wrong yet we trust the other person to be there when we walk out.

I breathed in.

"Alex? Are you ready?" My father gleamed.

My heart skipped several beats, and not trusting my speech, I nodded. He grabbed my hand and the doors swung open. All felt so slow, individuals rose up to see me. People I recognize and some unknown. There was only one face I was looking for, Casey's. I looked straight ahead and felt this overwhelming feeling to cry. She is beautiful, oh god she was gorgeous. I held, at least tried to hold it in, the tears from running down my cheeks and maybe taking some make-up with it.

Casey obviously didn't care she was full on crying. She is staring at me lovingly. I wanted to run to her, but elegance overtook that. She noticed and almost started chuckling, but bit her bottom lip.

As I got closer to her I speeded up a little and my father gave me a kiss on the cheek and let me stand directly opposite to Case.

"Hey." She smiled wiping tears. Everyone echoed with laughter.

I laughed too. She is being cute. I want to kiss her right this moment.

After several minutes, of the man speaking and telling everyone what marriage is and the two adjoining individuals, which are Casey and I, we stated our vows.

"Alex," Casey began, "The moment I saw you, I hated your guts."

We all joined in laughter.

She smiled, "I seriously couldn't stand you. You made me angry every day. Then one day I needed someone and you were there. It was like you were sent from heaven. I fell in love with you and you took over my heart. You were what I was looking for. I learned to love you and you me. I don't know what is going to happen after this but I know I am ready to live the rest of my life with you." She started tearing and I lifted my hand to wipe it for her. "I promise to always be there for you, support you, to always make your life fun and never boring, to show you love, to tell you every day just how beautiful you are. I love you so much it is hard to put into words. When I hold you, it is not tight enough. When I kiss you, it is not passionate enough. Even my most passionate kisses don't come close to show you how much you mean to me. You are my Wonder Woman, my Little Mermaid, my Goddess and my Queen. When you run up and throw your arms around me, I know that you feel the same as I do and that is the best feeling in the world. I am completely happy and never want that feeling to end. So I stand here today in front of these witnesses, our friends and family, staring into your amazing big blue eyes, to ask you a very important question; Do you, Alexandra Cabot, my best friend, my lover, my soul mate and my partner-in-crime be my lawful wedded wife?" She made the cutest smile.

I was breath taken. "I…I do." I broke into tears.

"Alex?" he turned to me.

I nodded, "Casey, you are the love of my life. The way you looked at me the first time we ever met, clicked something in me. I fell in love with you. I promised myself that once I got out of the program, I would get to know you. There was a serious glitch in that plan. You know things don't always go as we planned but they do have a way of figuring itself out." I breathed. "When I walked in here I really didn't know what to expect... Was this real? Am I really getting married to the love of my life? It's so surreal. I just love you so much." I wiped the tears from my eyes and Casey smiled. "I am honored to take you as my wife. I vow to love you and cherish you. I promise to laugh with you in the good times, and cry with you during the bad times. I will help you up when you fall down, and be there to cheer you on when you're at your best. No matter what happens, I will love you and always be there for you. Today and forever." I gaze into her green orbs, "I can't believe I'm looking into the eyes of my wife. You are the most beautiful woman in the world. More than that, you're smart, you always know how to make me laugh, and you are everything I ever wanted in a woman. Thank you for loving me, and I promise that I will love you for the rest of our lives, just as much as I love you right now. I love you Casey Novak. Do you, Casey Novak, my everything, my best friend, my lover, be my lawful wedded wife?"

"I do." She smiled

After a few words, there was my favorite phrase, "You may kiss the bride."

Everyone laughed at how fast we were on each other. We kissed for quite a while.

Then was the eating and dancing. Our first dance as a married couple was tragic.

"You remember the steps?" Casey whispered in my ear.

"Casey!" I gasped.

"What?" She chuckled.

"You told the dance teacher you got the steps down packed." Annoyed I whispered the steps in her ear, which was pointless since she did the opposite.

"Sorry?" She gave me a pouty face as her dad grabbed her.

Before I could walk off, someone grabs me to dance.

"Congrats on the wedding. So what is it going to be Novak- Cabot, Cabot- Novak, she takes your name, or you take hers? "Olivia smiled.

Casey did warn me she also provided invitations to her exes for closure.

I never said I liked it. "We are keeping our names." I smiled to try to relieve the tenseness between us.

"Before you, I was thinking she take my name. Trust me I am not bitter or anything. I know she chose you and truth be told you are pretty likeable. I loved you once." She smiled and twirled me.

I looked around for another dance partner. This was getting awkward.

"Alex, why are you so nervous. Calm down." She frowns.

Let's see… maybe because I am most likely your mortal enemy.

I just nod, "Yes, I should calm down." I let out a gasp of air.

"So as I was saying... I have no hard feelings. Alex Cabot always gets what she wants. "She smirked. "I just want you to know that if you hurt Casey in anyway, I will surely be there to reconcile her... I am just returning the favor." She became gravely serious.

She twirled me once more. "Congrats Mrs. Cabot." She smiled as she walked straight to Fin.

I quickly looked for Casey, who was in a laughing fit. Then she looked my way. "My wife beckons for me gentlemen." Already drunk.

I pull her to the dance floor. "Case, Olivia is out to get me..." I tell her worried.

She put her finger over my mouth, "Fuck everyone. This is our day. "She smiled.

She lifted me and I let out a squeal.

That is when I truly had fun. We popped bottles like it was a New Year.

I hadn't encountered Olivia after that and Case and I headed out to our honeymoon in Cancun.

Good thing we had a driver, or else this day would have proved tragic.

I am now married to the love of my life.

"I love you, Casey Novak." I leaned and kissed her.

"I love you more, Alex Cabot."

_**The END.**_


End file.
